I opened an antique shop, went to Antarctica, joined the Circus, tried to invade China but got distracted by a shiny piece of metal, I discovered a new species of Aaaardvark that will guarantee me a spot at the very beginning of the encyclopedia, I managed to finally crossbreed ants and whales (you don't want to see the colonies), I've been using the spelling checker that cames with the brewser I'm using... Schemes to work. I've taken over and am now in the Guinness book of records as the owner of the largest collection of isosceles triangles in South East Queensland. Three chipmunks tried to force me to adopt and raise them, I thought about making a series of cartoons about the events that might ensue but didn't think anyone would be interested. The Queensland Government offered me $10000 NOT to grow corn, I'm still considering... I voted. I realised that NSW DOES have a purpose. It separates QLD from Victoria. I invented TRIPLE sided sticky tape, I went swimming with the sharks, what that football team were doing in my pool I don't know. I answered the phone in my pajamas this morning, then I took the phone out of my pajamas and put it back on the hook. I invented a new no fiber breakfast cereal with added MSG and am trying took hook up the asbesto company to make the boxes but they never answer their phone anymore, I've trained myself to dream only of female horses in a bid to boycott the equestrian industry but I think it's just giving me nightmares, I found the Ctrl-C/Ctrl-V shortcuts, I found the Ctrl-C/Ctrl-V shortcuts, I found the Ctrl-C/Ctrl-V shortcuts, I found the Ctrl-C/Ctrl-V shortcuts, I found the Ctrl-C/Ctrl-V shortcuts, I found the Ctrl-C/Ctrl-V shortcuts, I found the Ctrl-C/Ctrl-V shortcuts, I found the Ctrl-C/Ctrl-V shortcuts, I found the Ctrl-C/Ctrl-V shortcuts, I found the Ctrl-C/Ctrl-V shortcuts, I found the Ctrl-C/Ctrl-V shortcuts, I found the Ctrl-C/Ctrl-V shortcuts, I found the Ctrl-C/Ctrl-V shortcuts, I found the Ctrl-C/Ctrl-V shortcuts, I found the Ctrl-C/Ctrl-V shortcuts, I found the Ctrl-C/Ctrl-V shortcuts, I found the Ctrl-C/Ctrl-V shortcuts. I got a hair cut. I figured out who shot JFK, you just have to read his name backwards in Hebrew while transferring all non-Vowels to their appropriate Jewish character (that should keep them going for while), I crashed into a charter boat (I honestly didn't see it), I had a son, I subscribed to Arab Shoemaker Monthly, I got another hair cut, I invented 8-up - it tastes so much better (I don't know why they stopped at 7?!?), I fixed my computer, I fixed my friends computer, I fixed his friends computer, I refused to fix HIS friends computer unless he regrouted my bathroom, I put mistletoe on a ceiling fan and turning in into a contact sport, got another hair cut, I started a NRL team the Pink Daisy Dancers but can't yet find any players (Call me Warick Capper!) I got frustrated and the government for being stupid, I took my friend to the doctor to get her naval re-centered, my uncle started suffering from fallen arches, a bridge fell on him, Canada stopped letting me over the border and that's the last time I only take one pair of pants on holidays, I did a chin up (don't laugh it's hard!), I alphabetised my stamp collection by artist, I meditated for 16 days on the taste of pink, I realised that non-flammable is just a challenge, I found out why you shouldn't hold a cat and a dust busted at the same time, I bandaged my arm, I did another chin up, I learnt not to answer your wife when she asks "Do you think I'm stupid?", I slept on the couch, the Amart dude woke me up when they were closing, I got a hair cut, I invented a new science, I discovered the cure for a disease which hasn't yet been created, my aunty then got very sick from the cure and nearly died. And this morning, you'll never believe this... I had TOAST for breakfast, that's right TOAST. Get this... With BUTTER!!!

Anyway, off to Mexico see you in the morning.